Day 112

IMG_1476I think it’s about time to start you on solid foods to keep you full longer.  We’ve gone from sleeping all through the night to waking up twice a night.  Good thing you see the doctor in 1 week for your 4 month check up!

EVERYTHING is going in your mouth now.  I’m pretty sure that you’re teething…  We’ve nicknamed you drool-buckets, because you drool all the time and you can fill buckets with amount you salivate.  And you chew on your hands and arms.  You don’t suck you thumb, but your hand and fist go into your mouth… and then you start talking.  You’re crazy, kiddo!

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Day 111

IMG_1468We woke up to snow today!  Not record-breaking snowfall, but the fourth most snow in the month of March.  That meant that school was closed and you had to stay at home with me all day while dad braved the roads and headed into work.

Your take on snow right now: NOT A FAN!  When your hands touched the snow, you pulled your hands away.  I tried to put you in the snow on your back, and you immediately started screaming.  I wanted to send dad that picture, but obviously you had other ideas.  Oh, and it was really bright because of the sun and all the snow… you didn’t like that either.  I give you about a year (maybe two) until you change your mind.

You want to crawl so bad!  You tried again today; it was really more of a sideways motion.  You did manage to scoot yourself forward on the bed, so that’s progress!

Day 110

IMG_1474You’re such a tired baby!  You went from happy to tired in one day… well, usually it only takes a couple hours for that to happen, so it’s not too surprising.  This picture was taken right after your last bottle of the night, after your shower, and right after you fell asleep.  You were just so tired.  I don’t even remember you playing all that much once we got you home.

The weather was really bad today, with lots of rain and a cold front that moved through.  We put you in these long sleeves after your shower because we knew it would get colder during the night.  Hopefully, this is the last drastic weather change we have this season.  I don’t think anyone’s allergies can take it anymore!

Day 108

IMG_1411You WORE YOURSELF OUT at school today!  You had just finished eating when dad picked you up from school, and by the time you got home you had a little spit up on your shirt.  You got too excited; it happens 🙂 You love the sound of dad’s voice.

I promise that you don’t just sleep all the time.  And you sleep on me more than you sleep on dad, but I love taking pictures of you and dad together.

You have so much congestion right now, I’m sure it’s hard for you to breathe.  It was really cold today, but tomorrow is supposed to be in the 60s.  I’m really hoping that we all stay well this week and next.  I’m ready for spring to come… not too much longer, I hope.

Encouragement for Moms

I generally write letters to my son in this blog, but today’s for the moms.  I’ve been surprised lately with the amount of content in mom blogs that address the feelings of inadequacy in new moms.  Yes, I subscribe to several other mom blogs.  I love reading other mom blogs because it allows me to identify and commiserate (most often) with other new moms and learn from more experienced moms.  I’m intrigued by scenarios in which other moms find themselves, and the critical thinking used in those situations.  The majority of my friends are in different places in their lives, and we can’t talk “mom and baby”.  Plus, I work from home and my son isn’t old enough to join the ‘Mommy And Me’ play groups yet, so I don’t get a lot of bonding time with other moms.

The items listed below are little things with which I’ve made peace.   Nobody has all the answers, and I’d be leery of of anyone who claimed they did.

  1. In no way will I judge another mother for how she makes it through her day.  Everyone copes in different ways; everyone is different and so is every baby.  Nobody lives your life except you.  Becoming a parent is exciting, wonderful, magical, and awesome; it’s also scary, stressful, intimidating, and overwhelming.  I don’t think it matters how many children you have; every day is different and presents new challenges.  Cry if you need to cry, take a minute for yourself, and relax.  Stretch your shoulders and shake out your arms.  You will get through this.
  2. I will be more patient, and I won’t offer my opinion unless asked.  What’s right for me might not be right for the next mom.  There’s no ‘miracle cure’, ‘instruction manual’. or ‘perfect parent’.  It’s a lot of trial and error (and error, and error, and error).  If my son’s been fed, been changed, and had a nap… then why won’t he stop crying?!  Take a deep breath in, exhale, and try something new.  You’re allowed to make mistakes; you’re only human.  I know that it’s really hard to remember that when you have a screaming baby, though.  The screaming will stop, the air will clear and so will your head, and you’ll take mental notes for next time.
  3. Day school (day care) was the best thing we did for our son.  My husband and I both have careers that we love, and neither one of us could do our job and look after our son every day.  Both would suffer.  It was difficult sending him to school at such a young age, but it was best for everyone.  I had a hard time realizing that I probably wouldn’t be the first person to watch him crawl, walk, or hear his first word.  It’s still hard.  But, he’s very well cared for, he’s developing faster than if he were at home, and he’s socialized.  Our son wears himself out playing at school, and he sleeps all through the night.  Yes, he’s already had RSV, but he got through it just fine, and he’s stronger now.
  4. My body will never be the same.  I could write a whole book on this topics… It took almost 10 months to grow our baby boy, and my body can’t fully recover from that weight fluctuation.  I’m older than the average new mom, I gained 45 pounds with this pregnancy, and our son was a giant.  But I’m healthy, I make good decisions for myself, and my husband and son love me.  In fact, I’m pretty sure my son loves that I’m a little soft, and my husband loves that I have more curves.  You’re allowed to have a different shape after growing a human.  I’m sure I’ll have those amazing arms and great legs again… after about a year or so of chasing a baby around 🙂
  5. Anyone who can’t understand why my house is a mess is either not a parent or hires someone to keep the house clean for them.  The only way we keep our house clean is to tag-team it.  My husband and I split the house chores: I do the laundry and clean the bedrooms and bathrooms, and he does everything else.  I have to get my housework done during the day (like on my lunch break) or before the boys come home.  Once the boys get home, I watch after our son and my husband cleans the kitchen, does the dishes, and makes dinner.  As long as we have clean underwear and clothes for school, I don’t worry about too much else.  And if we’re too tired to clean the kitchen one night, the dishes can wait.  Your self-worth isn’t reliant on how clean you keep your house.
  6. We’ve found sanity in the form of a schedule.  This is paired with the allowance of deviating from that schedule when we feel it necessary.  Schedules are awesome because you can expect and plan for the next event.  It’s noon: my son falls asleep.  It’s 2pm: my son should wake up and want to eat.  But if our little guy refuses to adhere to the schedule, we have a contingency plan.  If that doesn’t work, we play it by ear.  Everything takes more time now; It’s not the end of the world.
  7. Sometimes, no amount of preparation can prepare you for what’s about to happen next.  When our son was recovering from RSV, we took him over to Grandma’s house for a visit.  It was about time for him to eat, so we let grammy do it.  Vomit everywhere.  We got everyone changed and the vomit cleaned off the couch.  Then we tried again, and vomit everywhere again.  Well, we used our set of emergency clothes, so we had to take our baby home naked (in a diaper) and hungry.  See Day 71.  I’m sure this won’t be the last time something like this happens.  You can’t take situations like this too seriously; you’ll just stay mad, and that’s no good for anyone.

All of this to say one thing: All the hiccups in your days are not these giant failures you imagine; all the days you make it through are victories.  And after a little while of ‘making it through’ the days, you’ll start enjoying the days.  The things that used to cause such strife in your days won’t phase you.  The formerly traumatic experiences will now make you laugh.  You’ll develop a new ‘normal’, and it will be great.  And those are HUGE victories!

Day 106

IMG_1403We went to the mall today, mainly so we (I) wouldn’t go stir crazy.  The roads were really patchy, but nothing that BB couldn’t handle.  I found out the hard way that it’s a lot easier to walk on ice that it is slush.  I was really glad that I had the stroller to help keep my balance…  We found coffee cups at the mall.  I know that you don’t care, but we’ve been waiting since November for these coffee cups to be restocked.  I’ll teach you about the structural mechanics of coffee mugs once you’re old enough to drink coffee.

We were gone for 4 hours today, and you were a perfect little angel.  After the mall, we also ventured out to Golfsmith and the PGA Store.  Mom got some new Top Golf shoes at Golfsmith, and dad got to hit some new drivers. I think he’s learned that his Nike driver isn’t right for him anymore.  My ribs are still bothering me, so I didn’t get to hit any drivers.  Everyone at the PGA Store knows you… because you’re so awesome!  We got me some new pink golf balls and a Spock driver head cover.  I’m almost all set to start golfing for real!!!

Day 104

IMG_1368Another crazy weather day!  It was really cold.  No ice and no snow, but still below freezing.

Dad and I went to hit golf balls at the PGA Store before we went to pick you up from school.  It was lots of fun; maybe one day we’ll get you some clubs and take you to the driving range.

You had a pretty great evening, but it’s been kind of hard to get you to fall asleep with out rocking or singing to you.  I think you like snuggling with me 🙂